Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Giving Anonymously



"Anyone who enjoys putting cash under a friends door or in their mailbox will often times not know if their friend actually got the gift and they cannot hear what it meant to them. So, Lionel Thompson came up with an idea to have a messaging line where recipients could call after receiving their gift. Take a look!"





Monday, August 24, 2009

"Putpockets" give a little extra cash



LONDON (Reuters) – Visitors to London always have to be on the look out for pickpockets, but now there's another, more positive phenomenon on the loose -- putpockets.

Aware that people are suffering in the economic crisis, 20 former pickpockets have turned over a new leaf and are now trawling London's tourist sites slipping money back into unsuspecting pockets.

Anything from 5 pounds ($8) to 20 pound notes is being surreptitiously deposited in unguarded pockets or open handbags in Trafalgar Square, Covent Garden and other busy spots.

The initiative, which runs until the end of August in London before being rolled out countrywide, is being funded by a broadbrand provider, which says it wants to brighten up people's lives in unusual ways.

"It feels good to give something back for a change -- and Britons certainly need it in the current economic climate," said Chris Fitch, a former pickpocket who now heads TalkTalk's putpocketing initiative.

"Every time I put money back in someone's pocket, I feel less guilty about the fact I spent many years taking it out."

London's police have been briefed about the plan, which will see at least 100,000 pounds given away.

(Reporting by Luke Baker; Editing by Kate Kelland)

Friday, August 7, 2009

9 Tips To Be A Better Communicator

I thought I knew a lot about communication, thanks to years of courses with Landmark Education. However, the article below gave me a couple of tips that could help me some more.

Funky to Fabulous: 9 Tips To Be A Better Communicator

The bizarre exchange I had last night with my new hair wrangler highlighted how poorly American's listen to one another. Kelly and I chatted as she flat ironed my rebellious curly hair into the sleek submission that matches my book cover. (Audiences seem think I am the cousin of the author if I don't have straight hair...go figure.)

"So, your daughter is in high school? What's she interested in?" I asked.

"He married his assistant. The one he was having an affair with, now they are traveling everywhere together." she replied.

Nope. I am not making it up. That is a direct quote.

I asked her about her daughter not about the ex-husband that she had divorced ten years ago. What a perfect illustration of how many of us don't listen to one another. No wonder so many of our relationships are tangled up in misunderstandings.

Want to have a better day- fast? Listen up. One of the best ways to replenish yourself in the midst of a stressful situation (particularly if you are a woman) is through communication and connection. You can go from feeling funky to fabulous by actively engaging in listening. Paying attention to what you are hearing is a magnificent way to be a better communicator. Why? Because it demonstrates that you value the person with whom you are speaking.

In my coaching practice, I continually see that enhancing listening skills can help you whether you are leading a team of 1,000 or just trying to have a better relationship with that person sitting across from you drinking coffee.

1. Don't Let The Words Distract You

Numerous studies show that less than half of what is communicated is through spoken words. Some studies give words even less weight on the communication scale. Albert Mehrabian, Ph.D. conducted some of the most influential studies on the importance for the nonverbal components of communication. His landmark report rated 7% importance for words, 38% for tone and 55% for and body language for their effectiveness. Whether you dispute or agree with his percentages, they illustrate that you miss a great deal of content if you listen to words alone.

HOW someone says something is far more important than WHAT they say. Listen for infections, signs and coughs. These are unconscious body signals that 'highlight' a statement. They tell you that what was just said was important. For example if someone says, "I love working on that project." and then coughs or sighs it is likely that there is a part of them that doesn't believe the statement.

2. Oh, What A Difference A But Makes

Become a "but" watcher and you'll be dazzled at how much better your perception becomes. Pay attention to the word "but" in any sentence. It tells you, the listener, that everything said before the "but" might not be the truth. "I love my new position, but the hours drive me insane." The bigger truth in that sentence is that the speaker is drowning under their workload.

3. Don't Skip The End

Pay particular attention to what someone says at the end of a sentence. "I'd like to put together a presentation, except I don't know how." Often people make a preamble of what they think the listener would like you hear. Many save the most honest part of a statement for the end of a sentence.

4. Ask Is Not A Four Letter Word

Just because you speak the same language...don't assume you understand another person. The message sent is often not the message received. Masterful listeners ask, ask, ask. Any sales executive knows that the person asking the questions is the person in control of the conversation. An easy way to become an expert listener is to verify that your perception of what was said was what the speaker meant.

5. The "Should, Can't, Have To" Crystal Ball.

Each one of these words conveys a negative belief or perceived assessment of a situation. Watch the statement that follows "Should", "Can't, and "Have To." The listener is telling you that they really don't want to do what they are saying. Watch these words closely and folks around you will think you are plugged into the psychic hot line.

6. Yes, No...No Way

If you are asking a "Yes, No" question you are not giving your listener the room to communicate with depth. Why bother interacting if you don't want real information? We have gotten into the habit of speaking in sound bites. Power up your listening by adding more open-ended questions. (Questions that require something other than a yes or no answer.)

"What can I do to be a better _____ friend, partner, neighbor?"

(Add your own favorite here)

Use this courageous open-ended question to transform just about any situation or relationship.

7. Men Lay The Bricks and Women Toss The Salad

Do you feel misunderstood by the opposite sex? One of the reasons that we drive each other bonkers is that we expect that other gender to communicate the way we do. They don't. The Today Show just asked me to share some tips on the difference in male/female communication. Men tend to speak in succinct logical progression. Women mix it up. Here's an easy visual for gender communication styles.

Man Speak = Laying Bricks

Woman Speak = Tossing Salad.

I will be going into this more deeply in future posts.

8. Don't Throw A Brick In The Salad

Interrupting a speaker is a key signpost of lousy listening. Wait least four seconds after the person finishes speaking before you respond. This will help train you not to cut off the speaker until they are finished with an idea. Ladies, don't disturb a man laying bricks. Not interrupting men is key since they have a more linear communication style than women.

9. Don't Listen With Your Ears.

The University of Santa Monica has a revolutionary program of Spiritual Psychology. One of the skills they teach is Heart Centered Listening. Imagine that your heart had ears. If you listen with your heart you will hear the depth of the message any person is trying to convey.

So, close your mouth, open your heart and find out what that other astonishing human being has to share with you. It may surprise you.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Story writing contest ...

There was a contest in TCS to write a fictional story for 500 words max which would start with the line ” On a dark and foggy night, a small figure lay huddled on the railway tracks leading to the Chennai station
This is what a guy wrote for the contest……. and surprisingly, it was adjudged the best short story

On a dark and foggy night, a small figure lay huddled on the railway tracks leading to the Chennai station. At once I was held back to see someone in that position during midnight with no one around. With curiosity taking the front seat, I went near the body and tried to investigate it. There was blood all over the body which was lying face down. It seemed that a ruthless blow by the last train could have caused the end of this body which seemed to be that of a guy of around my age. Amidst the gory blood flow, I could see a folded white envelope which was fluttering in the midnight wind. Carefully I took the blood stained envelope and was surprised to see the phrase “appraisal letter”on it. With curiosity rising every moment, I wasted no time in opening the envelope to see if I can find some details about the dead guy. The tag around the body’s neck and the jazzy appraisal cover gave me the hint that he might be a software engineer. I opened the envelope to find a shining paper on which the appraisal details where typed in flying colors. Thunders broke into my ears and lightening struck my heart when I saw the appraisal amount of the dead guy!!!!! My God, it was not even, as much as the cost of the letter on which the appraisal details were printed…. My heart poured out for the guy and huge calls were heard inside my mind saying “no wonder, this guy died such a miserable death”… As a fellow worker in the same industry, I thought I should mourn for him for the sake of respect and stood there with a heavy heart thinking of the shock that he would have experienced when his manager had placed the appraisal letter in his hand. I am sure his heart would have stopped and eyes would have gone blank for few seconds looking at the near to nothing increment in his salary.
While I mourned for him, for a second my hands froze to see the employee’s name in the appraisal letter… hey, what a strange co-incidence, this guy’s name is same as mine, including the initials. This was interesting. With some mental strength, I turned the body upside down and found myself fainted for a second. The guy not only had my name, but also looked exactly like me. Same looks, same built, same name…. it was me who was dead there!!!!!!! ! While I was lost in that shock, I felt someone patting on my shoulders. My heart stopped completely, I could not breathe and sprung in fear to see who was behind……… splash!!! Went the glass of water on my laptop screen as I came out of my wild dream to see my manager standing behind my chair patting on my shoulder saying, “wake up man? Come to meeting room number two. I have your appraisal letter ready”.